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I was what you would call a high functioning person. My life looked great on a resume.
What people didn’t know was that I also suffered from Complex Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (CPTSD) from long term parental abuse. If you think dealing with daily life is hard, try doing it with CPTSD. Most days, anxiety and dread plagued me. I rarely got a good night’s sleep.
Not understanding what healthy relationships looked like, I went from one unsuccessful relationship to another. I couldn’t understand why the loving relationship I’ve always wanted continued to escape me.
Looking back, these trials and tribulations were blessings in disguise. It motivated me to dig deep for a solution. I did not want a life full of suffering, and I did not want a medicated, muted existence either.
I wanted to return myself to the fearless, adventurous, and creative child I once was. I wanted to be fully alive.
It took me years of research and lots of trial and error, but I found a way to heal myself. I learned how to love myself, manage difficult emotions, communicate skillfully with others, and set healthy boundaries. These changes didn’t all come at once, but cumulatively, it made me a new person. I was finally happy and content in my own company.
What is necessary to change a person is to change his awareness of himself.
― Abraham Maslow
Shortly after, I met a kind, courageous, and high-integrity man. He is now my husband. We also have an adopted cat that we love called Snuggles.
I never dreamed that life could be this good. I am grateful for it every day, and I continue to learn and grow.
They say childhood trauma terrorizes you twice – once growing up, and again as adults when the world punishes us for lacking healthy coping skills. Many of us get stuck in toxic relationships, and some of us become abusers.
This is a painful cycle I wish to end.
I run this site and the Facebook group “Life Is Love School,” to help people heal from childhood trauma. I want people to know that healing is not only possible, but we can come out of the experience stronger, wiser, and more compassionate towards ourselves and others.
I want everyone to live the good life they deserve.
You are loved.
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